in the wind weekly #6
Hey Friends,
I’ll cut to the chase with y’all. I forgot to write all day cause I was back and forth between folks that I care deeply about all day. So, that’s not an excuse why this is coming to your inbox so late in the day, but an acknowledgment of the things that truly matter in life. In the thru-hiking community, everyone used to say, “It’s the people” and I don’t think I truly understood what that meant until recently. So, as I write this, know that there is a house party in the background happening in the house that I’m hanging out in, while I sit in the “office”, after playing pool for a few hours, with two dear friends singing and playing drums and playing guitar. And in this moment, things feel like they have meaning.
It was earlier this week that I got sick and laid in bed for a full day and a half contemplating life and the meaning of it all (mostly, if there really was meaning at all). And as I wrapped up “Think Like a Monk” and traded it for “Shoe Dog” (the memoir about the founder of Nike), I found myself thinking deeply about what it meant to move through the world with a level of competence and confidence.
There is something about watching an entire season of Avatar (the new live-motion version) in a day and a half, while in a daze of sleeping for 18 hours that really brings you to your core. And i rounded out my notes on “Think Like a Monk” with the quote found on page 192 and the concepts from page 243.
The first quote reads, “Confidence means deciding who you want to he without the reflection of what other people think, but it also means being inspired and led by others to become your best self. Spend time with healed, wise, service-driven people and you will feel humbled — and motivated toward healing, wisdom, and service.”
To me, there is a delicate balance between having the boldness to pursue the things that we individually feel drawn to, and the appreciation and respect for others who have either walked the path we are moving down or helped to direct our way.
And the idea that we are the culmination of the five or so individuals that we spend the most time with. Choosing to spend time with individuals who care about my well being and the path that I am walking down, and for some reason feeling ready to let them in. I can’t explain how important this feels in my process.
What am I trying to say?
Something about knowing that this is the path that I am going to walk, and wanting to encourage you to find your path and run as hard as you possibly can down it. Because I am learning that it is 100% worth it. Through all of the getting fired and/or laid off, and the hard times, and the “failing fast and failing quickly.” There is something that feels so beautiful about finding the confidence to walk down this path, despite how scared I am of it not working.
And that choosing to spend time with people that I can call mentors and inspirations and friends makes a difference. I’m not saying this because it’s a revelation. I’m saying it because it’s so simple and it’s something that I’ve overlooked and taken for granted for so. damn. long.
And I am so very grateful to have worked as hard as I have, despite all of the “failures” and the packs of spaghetti that haven’t stuck to the wall and sit in a pile on the floor. So that I can try to send out a silly little letter moments before the day comes to an end in the spirit of chasing a dream that feels the most meaningful that I’ve ever had the pleasure to pursue.
So, hears to failing fast and failing quickly. To spending time with people we care about. To pursuing dreams that feel WAY out of our reach because “why the fuck not.” I’m not saying it’s right.
And maybe I’ll write in a few months about something completely different. But for now, it feels right, so I will continue down this path.
Not sure what you’ll take from this other than the reminder that life is short, and so I encourage you to pursue whatever it is that your soul feels called to. No matter how outrageous it seems. Just to find out. Cause all I want to know is the answer to “what if…” and I know that will take time.
And here’s a practical concept from Page 243 of the book that the author calls “The six loving exchanges.” I wonder if these can hold value if we can contemplate and bring them to our exchanges with others:
Giving with intention.
Receiving with gratitude
Listen without judgment
Speaking with vulnerability
Preparing without agenda
Receiving with presence
And so, it’s nearly midnight and I’m being challenged to PingPong, and I’m just getting this out to y’all. I’m far from perfect. Very far. But I’m doing my best to show up every week to send out a letter that might give at least one of you some insight or hope or inspiration or anything meaningful.
The process is not linear, nor always fun, or easy. And not to be too cheesy, but I really want to lean into the concept that it’s the process that matters. And that sometimes you end up at a house party at 11:25 pm and realize you haven’t done the main thing that you’ve set out to do each week.
So, as always, thank you for being here. And know that I am meeting you here, as honestly as I possibly can, trying to do what I have set out to do. And I understand that the process is messy and so. damn. beautiful. when you share it with others who care deeply about you and mutually create something that feels good.
And remember, it’s a couple of drinks and a couple of games of pool at 11:42 pm that I am finishing these words. Wherever you are, and however you feel, know that it might not look exactly like you envision it (cause this sure isn’t how I envisioned sending this one out). If there is one thing that I’m learning, it is that it sure is worth it in the end to keep the promises that you make to yourself. Cause, in the end, that’s what matters.
